Seven in a Half Months

As of late, my favorite thing to do in the evening is hold my sleeping son in my arms.  Many of my memories revolve around me holding my baby.  I remember embracing him immediately after I gave birth to him.  To this day, I'm really the only one that can get away with holding him inward (vs. his preferred view toward the world).  Even though Sammy is a big boy for his age, when I hold him and he's snuggling with me, it's that o so familiar feeling that he's my little newborn all over again.

Being a working mom who nurses is lonely.  I was encouraged when there were several of us, but as of late, I'm the only one using the Mommy room on a regular basis.  I press on, but it's not easy.  I have to be intentional in making the time or I would get caught up in my work.  I pump to maintain what I have with Sammy, a bond that I wouldn't trade for the world.  But let's face it, a pump will never do as good of a job as a baby. 

Last Thursday evening I attended a ladies Christmas dinner held at my church.  The speaker shared how God blessed her with an unlikely gift, a difficult disease.  Her story really spoke to me because I could relate due to my infertility.  What a wonderful way to start this holiday season, reflecting on the unlikely gifts of my life and how God has used them.  I went home and stared at my baby boy, consumed once again by tears of joy.  Thankful to return home and find my little sleeping someone in his crib.  Any day we anticipate Sammy may start to crawl, leading us into the next phase of parenting with a little boy on the move.